The Stress Of The Holiday are Killing Me

I am supposed to blog every day.
I am supposed to listen to training for at least 1 hour a day.
I am supposed to home-school my children.
I am supposed to clean house.
I am supposed to be a loving wife.
On top of that Thanksgiving is right around the corner and as always it is at my house.
Which means I now have to clean even more,
because I will not have company over unless my house is clean,
I mean clean.
If I had my way we would use paper plates,
cook in all disposable pans and use disposable cups,
but my husband wants the Good Dishes,
to use all the fine crystal and Real glasses.
Of course, the fine gold plated silverware.
All the meats are supposed to be cooked by my mom,
but just talked to her and she is sick
and unless she feels better by Tuesday I will be cooking the meat on top of everything else.
Don't take me wrong I enjoy having everyone over,
but this year I don't know if I will make it.
Stress is my enemy.
 I fight Chronic Fatigue Immune Dysfunction Syndrome.
Most people don't know about this disease
and most family members just don't understand "Why" you are crying, hurting, unable to think clearly.
Why can't you just go to the mall without having a full-blown panic attack?
 I am kind of lucky there,
because my children have learned that when I say we have to leave a store
they know I mean "NOW".
I found a great ebook that teaches about CFIDS and Fibromyalgia.
Page 5-6 shows how we handle stress and page 13-14 shows the symptoms.
On page 5 it talks about good stress and bad stress.
Let's just say I have more bad than good right now.
 I have been fighting a torn rotator cuff for the last 3 months and tomorrow I get to go and get a steroid injection. This will help my shoulder but the stress of it flares my CFIDS.
So much that the first two blogs
I started either were deleted by accident or just sucked.
Life in my house is crazy right now, to say the least.
 I don't know how much more I can take.
My mind doesn't want to work right.
The tears are non stop and the pain is off the charts.
I am so tired of just fighting to think.
I am in school learning marketing.
I enjoy learning.
I get excited about learning new things and I want to apply all the things I am learning.
We will call this a good stress.
But as you will read in the ebook stress is stress.
I know I Will Crash.
That is The One Thing That Scared Me The Most.
Who Will Take Care Of My Children,
Who Will Take Care Of Me.
I Know All About Relaxation Techniques.
I Have All The Best Natural Remedies,
You Have To Remember I Have Been Fighting This For A Long Time.
I Will Keep Fighting.
I Will Keep Fighting As Long As God Wants Me To Fight.

Peace And Love

Donel Rourke